While some would argue that men’s fear of strong women harkens back to our caveman days

You meant to say some would argue that some men’s fears. Just as it isn’t true that women should be a particular way, there is nothing to say the stereotype of men are afraid of strong women is true of the entire population.

In other words, gender-based power imbalances were created by men and have been reinforced by men ever since

I don’t think we are ready to jump to that conclusion based on the original evidence. (Although the article makes invalid argument as there is no causal link between agriculture and the need for a man to have more wives.)

Even if we were to use the sited article, it would mean that the power imbalances were created by a group effort, everyone on board. Additionally we should say have been reinforced by some men and some women, as not everyone is on-board “ever since”. It also isn’t just some men, as you correctly pointed out, these imbalances are reinforced by some women who find protection in their current environment. Good or bad this is something we need to contend with.

If you act softly, sweetly, or shrink yourself to become more “likable,” then you’re reinforcing the idea that a woman is only valuable when she is submissive, nurturing, self-effacing, easy to work with, and easy to control.

However, it’s unfair to require the infringed group to change behavior they want to have because others (some men for instance) make incorrect assumptions as a result. While it is true that we live in a world where there are those that create and cling to stereotypes and adhere to current norms, it isn’t your fault for being that being that way. Some people want to be likable, and it has nothing to do with reinforcing the imbalance. You just need to pick your battles.